An Open Letter To My Baby


Dear Emerson,

This morning I left you sleeping on the bed while I took a shower. By the time I got out you were awake, and playing with your very fascinating foot. As I walked over I caught your eye and the smile that followed was the most beautiful I have ever seen. It wasn’t a typical smile, it consumed your whole body and the joy I felt in that smile can’t be put into words.
Becoming a mom is something I have always wanted., but when I found out I was pregnant I didn’t feel the connection right away that people talk about. Around the second trimester we found out you were a boy and it’s no secret that at first I was hoping for a girl. I thought that I wanted a princess to put headbands on and little pink tutus. The months went on, we painted the room blue and filled your closet with clothing. I started to feel this excited nervous energy. I so desperately wanted to see you, but I knew life would change so drastically and I didn’t know if Nick and I were ready for that.
On December 22nd we had our last appointment and the doctor suggested we schedule an induction for next week. I left that office so ready to become a mom and finally get to meet you. The next week flew by since we had all the Christmas festivities, but I was only focused on meeting you. Labor was painful, but knowing I was so close to holding  you kept me going. Then the doctor handed you to me and I had no idea what I was suppose to say! I just kept repeating the word ‘hi’ over and over and over.
Emerson you are my most prized possession, I love you more than I could have ever imagined. Watching you grow and learn and explore is such a gift. Thank you for making me a Mom and making my dreams come true.

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